For anything that doesn't quite fit into any other category.
2013 posts Page 3 of 202
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Ok, you're driving in rush hour traffic. Going nowhere fast. You have the time, so what do you do? You're starting to look at other drivers and their cars ... you see this, what do you do?

Attachments

Dane
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Knight Reflections

My Flickr, not the horse
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Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
How Rubber Gloves Are Made

Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves you can remember this...

A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
"Do you know how they make these gloves?" he asked.
"No, I don't," she replied.
"Well," he spoofed, "there's a building in Mexico with a big tank of latex and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size."
She didn't crack a smile........
"Oh, well. I tried," he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.........
"What's so funny?" he asked.
"I was just envisioning how condoms are made!"

Gotta watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always working.
Jen Clark
Canon 7D/50D, 5D Mark II, Lenses: 16-35m 2.8L, 85m 1.2L, 85m 1.8, 50m 1.8 II, 70-200 2.8 IS II, 1.4 extender
Currently working with CS5/LR3/Aperture 2
http://imagesbyjeniferclark.com ...Images by Jenifer Clark...
Pregnancy Q & A

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.
Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.
Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's gender?
A: Childbirth.
Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?
Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.
Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.
Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.
Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A: Yes , pregnancy.
Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.
Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.


as you can tell it's that Venus vs. Mars thing again........... :roll:
Jen Clark
Canon 7D/50D, 5D Mark II, Lenses: 16-35m 2.8L, 85m 1.2L, 85m 1.8, 50m 1.8 II, 70-200 2.8 IS II, 1.4 extender
Currently working with CS5/LR3/Aperture 2
http://imagesbyjeniferclark.com ...Images by Jenifer Clark...
"ESTROGEN ISSUES" 10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1- 800-".
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space".
8. You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.
9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.

Sorry men..........these are just a few jokes that I must share....no offense to the X chromosone.
Jen Clark
Canon 7D/50D, 5D Mark II, Lenses: 16-35m 2.8L, 85m 1.2L, 85m 1.8, 50m 1.8 II, 70-200 2.8 IS II, 1.4 extender
Currently working with CS5/LR3/Aperture 2
http://imagesbyjeniferclark.com ...Images by Jenifer Clark...
Top Ten Things Only Women Understand

10. Cats' facial expressions.
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
7. Fat clothes.
6 Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell.
4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
3. Eyelash curlers.
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.
AND, the Number One thing only women understand:
1. OTHER WOMEN
:mrgreen:
Jen Clark
Canon 7D/50D, 5D Mark II, Lenses: 16-35m 2.8L, 85m 1.2L, 85m 1.8, 50m 1.8 II, 70-200 2.8 IS II, 1.4 extender
Currently working with CS5/LR3/Aperture 2
http://imagesbyjeniferclark.com ...Images by Jenifer Clark...
Last joke for the evening............be back tomorrow :lol:

Subject: Lone Ranger and Tonto
Lone Ranger and Tonto were camping in the desert.
After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.
Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, "KemoSabe,
Look towards sky; what you see?"
The Lone Ranger replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What that tell you?" asked Tonto.
The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, "Astronomically
speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies. Time wise, it
appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning.
Theologically, the Lord is all powerful and we are small and
insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day
tomorrow. What's it tell you, Tonto?"
"You dumber than buffalo turds. "Someone stole tent."
Jen Clark
Canon 7D/50D, 5D Mark II, Lenses: 16-35m 2.8L, 85m 1.2L, 85m 1.8, 50m 1.8 II, 70-200 2.8 IS II, 1.4 extender
Currently working with CS5/LR3/Aperture 2
http://imagesbyjeniferclark.com ...Images by Jenifer Clark...
Okay, one more for the Lone Ranger. I'll apoligize in advance to any native americans.... :D

The Lone Ranger and Tonto ride into town and tie up their horses outside the local saloon. Tonto looks at the Lone Ranger's horse and says "Silver looks overheated, I'll run circles around him to make a breeze and cool him down." The Lone Ranger prceeds into the saloon and buys a drink. After a while a cowboy comes in and asks him if that was his white horse tied up outside. The Lone Ranger looks at him and asks "Why is there something wrong with him?" The cowboy replies "No, you just left your injun running."
Gary
D7000, D90, D200 ...and plenty of lenses.
"[i]Once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right.[/i]"
There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone brother
2. He liked Gospel
3. He didn't get a fair trial

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father's business
2. He lived at home until he was 33
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:
1. He talked with His hands
2. He had wine with His meals
3. He used olive oil

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:
1. He never cut His hair
2. He walked around barefoot all the time
3. He started a new religion

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian :
1. He was at peace with nature
2. He ate a lot of fish
3. He talked about the Great Spirit

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:
1. He never got married.
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.

But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:
1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was virtually no food
2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it
3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do.
Reka
CS3 on Vista, Nikon D40 (50mm1.4, 18-55mm and 70-300mm VR) and FIREFOX
ImageMOM

My galleries <------------------> My blog
There is a traditional sport in Ireland, "cliff shoving." It involves a small rodent, the rarie, being pushed off a cliff. The competitor who pushes the rarie over the edge with the least effort wins. Of course, these days people aren't so keen on blood sports. So, the rodents are nudged into a small shallow pit. Recently, an Australian competed. During a break, he mentioned that he'd had an 18-hour journey to get there. "But I knew it would be a long flight," he said. "After all, it's a long way to tip a rarie."
Dane
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Knight Reflections

My Flickr, not the horse
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Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
SOME PEOPLE SHOULD JUST NOT BE DRIVING A CAR

A police officer spotted a car speeding and swerving slightly. He pulled behind it and activated his lights. But the driver didn’t respond. So the officer pulled alongside the car. He was astounded to see that the driver was knitting. The officer lowered his window and yelled, “Pull over!” “No,” the driver hollered. “Scarf.”
Dane
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Knight Reflections

My Flickr, not the horse
-------------------------------------
Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?
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2013 posts Page 3 of 202

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